Naturally, the goal for an interview is to find that one excellent candidate that knocks your socks off. But when you’ve been involved in hiring people for any length of time, it’s inevitable that you’ll see the opposite. Interviews with candidates that just … well, that simply don’t go well. Suffice it to say, when you’ve been in this kind of work for as long as we have, you begin to collect some stories.

We’d like to share with you a few of those stories here. To be clear, we’re not doing this to shame anyone. We’ve changed some details to protect the innocent. There’s a reason why we think you’ll find this both interesting (and possibly funny) but also constructive. It’s because smart people learn from their mistakes; truly wise people learn from the mistakes of others. Let’s see what we can learn from these mistakes.

The Small Talker

For everyone except extreme extroverts, meeting new people is an experience fraught with at least some anxiety. To quell this anxiety in business meetings, some people – often, those in sales – advise pointing out some personal object in the office as a means of making small talk. Sometimes, this works. Other times, not so well. One memorable candidate interviewing with me pointed out a few items of football memorabilia in the office, talking at length about his World Cup memories and a few of his favourite players over the years. It was fascinating, so I let him continue on (possibly for longer than I should have). It was only when he finally stopped for a breath and asked me a question about football that I told him I was only using one of my colleagues’ offices, and quite honestly had relatively little knowledge of the sport.

The takeaway? Making small talk is difficult, and finding something personal and important to your interviewer is certainly one strategy to make it easier. It’s perhaps a better strategy, though, to start with a question rather than a soliloquy.

The Accidental Host

I remember one particular instance where I was led down the hall as my host – already in interview mode – chatted about their day. They led me into the meeting room, sitting down in one of the chairs. There was only one problem: they had taken my chair. You see, this person had come to my office to be interviewed by me, and it was only by virtue of good luck that they had found the correct room. It was a somewhat awkward moment when I indicated that I really would like to sit by my notes, and asked him to take the other chair.

The lesson here: when meeting an interviewer at their place of work, you’re a guest. If you’re either highly dominant, or – conversely – highly uncomfortable meeting new people, it can be easy to forget this in your haste or your discomfort. When you’re waiting for your interviewer, take a few breaths. Slow your mind down. Remind yourself to be a gracious guest, deferring to the host to indicate when and where you should follow, and following their lead in the initial conversation.

The Hard-to-Get Player

It’s an effective negotiating tactic to show the other party that you have less interest in the outcome than they do (even if it’s not entirely true). And while it’s true that competing for a job is a form of negotiation, this tactic can be taken too far.

One candidate had clearly received the advice that it would best serve her to play hard-to-get. Granted, we found her, contacting her about an opportunity that could be a fit. From the start, it was challenging to find an interview time that worked for her hectic schedule (which might have been our first warning sign). During the interview, her body language and facial expression communicated what I can only describe as acute disinterest. At the end of the interview, she might as well have said, “I suppose I could make myself available for an interview … if I really must …”. Needless to say, she didn’t have to in the end.

The working relationship between a candidate and a recruiter isn’t a game. We treat candidates with the utmost respect, as equal partners in a business discussion, the objective of which is to determine whether a job is a good fit. The lesson here: we don’t play games; neither should you.

The Sour Grapes (of Wrath)

 Speaking of respect, if we determine through the course of an interview that a candidate really isn’t a good fit for a job, we tend to let them know right then. It’s not fair to leave someone believing they might be in the running when they’re not. In most cases, candidates appreciate our openness, and are very happy to hear we’ll keep them in mind for other opportunities.

In one particular case, it was quite the reverse. We discovered through the interview that the candidate’s goals weren’t aligned with what the hiring company would offer, and we were upfront about that. The candidate reacted in dramatic fashion, angrily saying that they had never been interested in the job anyway, that they had only come in to be courteous, and that we had wasted their time.

I suspect that the takeaway here is fairly obvious, but I’ll point it out anyway. When a business discussion of any kind comes to a close that isn’t what you’d hoped for, it’s critical to respond professionally. That means being civil and courteous on the outside, no matter what you may be feeling inside. Particularly in this day and age, when everyone is so connected, it doesn’t pay to burn bridges.